#203:勤奋和决心对成功重要,还是容貌和金钱重要

Some people think success in life comes from hard work and determination, but others think there are more important factors like money and appearance. Discuss both sides and give your own opinion.
开头段替换词

hard work: industry, diligent, willing to work hard

determination: a sense of commitment, dedication

success: achieve success, lead a fulfilling life, achievements

money: wealth, fortune, financial resources, capital

appearance: good looking, beautiful, physical attractiveness, physically attractive

factors: key to success, predictor of success. 


开头段范例

It is sometimes argued that there are people who have achieved success because they are diligent and determined to win. I agree with this opinion, although some good-looking, wealthy people can have a good chance of succeeding in their lives as well. (7)


There has been an ongoing interest in analysing what makes people successful. I believe that personality traits such as diligence and mental toughness make some distinct from others and that wealth and appearance are less important. (7)


We have been interested in what distinguishes between extraordinary individuals and average people. In my opinion, people who have been successful in their careers normally have hallmarks such as diligence, even though they do not inherit a fortune from parents or look physically charming. (7)


结尾段范例

论述类题目不需要单独写结尾段

学生的观点点评

学生的观点

点评

家里有钱 容易把理想变现实 获得成功

太空泛。没有解释为什么有钱可以实现理想

钱可以花,外表随着时间减值 ,都会失去原来的价值,无法在未来或得生活的成功

跑题。这是论述类题目,应该讨论金钱和容貌对成功的贡献,而不是讨论钱和外表为什么获得不了成功。

A 努力有决心的工作

B不会轻易被诱惑而跳槽 专心自己的事业

C取得成功

逻辑不好。AB没有逻辑。

A 努力和决心 B 善于把握机会 C 成功

逻辑不好。为什么努力就可以善于把握机会?

A:努力工作和决心 B:自己被需要,成就感 C:人生成功

不够有力。要讨论为什么可以成功,而不是成功后的好处。

A金钱 /外貌 B筹集start-up funds C成功

例子当观点。筹集资金是一个例子,不是观点。

A人会打扮B 吸引更多人的关注C成功来自外表

不够有力。为什么吸引关注就可以成功?


主体段一

A 努力和有决心 B 遇到困难和挫折不放弃    C 成功

解释(why B is important):成功来之不易,需要不断尝试,不断犯错

解释(how):不断反思自己的问题,不断找方法

对比:有钱的人和长得漂亮的人,比较自信,有很多选择,容易放弃


拓展思路:
词伙:
范文:
主体段二

A+C 有钱和漂亮的人  B  人脉更好  C 更容易成功

解释(A-B):有钱的人有更多机会参加社交

解释(A-B2):漂亮给人留下深刻的印象

解释(B -C):建议,金钱的资助,职业的机会


拓展思路:
词伙:
范文:
主体段三

A 努力和有决心  B 不断进步,提升技能     C 成功

解释(A-B):没有金钱和容貌去赢得别人的认可,或者提高自己的知名度,只能关注其他的优势

解释 (B-C):更好地处理复杂的事情,做到行业的顶尖,

服务和产品有很多核心竞争力

对比:有钱和容貌的人比较容易获得成功,不大愿意付出努力去提升自己


拓展思路:
词伙:
范文:
学生的范文

学生的范文 (7+)


People who have positive qualities such as hard work and determination are believed to be more likely to succeed. I agree with this idea, although some people argue that money and appearance are more important.

A hard work and determination B 获得技能经验  C  success

解释(A—B):不断学习,不断在工作中发现问题解决问题

解释(A-B):有很好的决心,有目标,有计划,更加高效提升

Some people hold the view that hard work and determination hold the key to success as individuals who have these personality traits develop skills and gain experience gradually for their career. Industrious people seize every opportunity to increase knowledge and broaden experience in tackling work-related problems, thereby developing expertise in their professions and having a fulfilling career. Meanwhile, as they have determination to succeed, they have clear objectives and well-designed plans to achieve their targets in a step-by-step manner. This is also an important predictor of their achievement.

 

A money and appearance  B 有更多机会 C success

解释(A—B):可以做投资,获得一些回报

解释(A-B ): 给人留下印象,圈子更大, 获得一些工作和商业机会

Other people suggest that other factors such as money and appearance possibly play a more significant role in success since rich people with extraordinary looks have more opportunities. They have financial resources to make investments, which can create regular returns or boost material wealth. Physically attractive people can leave a strong impression others and make more friends in both work and social contexts, so they can explore more work or business opportunities to succeed in making money and achieving ambitions.

 

 

A hard work and determination B 克服挑战  C  success

解释(A-B):增加对一个东西的理解,找到解决方法,有新的发现

对比:有容貌和有钱的人有很多机会,觉得没有必要花时间和精力去克服一个挑战

 

In my view, diligence and perseverance are much more important than money and appearance because people who have these attributes are more likely to overcome challenges on the way to success. Whenever they face hardships, they would attempt to find solutions and reflect on mistakes. This enables them to deepen the understanding of their work or business and make new discoveries until they can resolve problems and achieve breakthroughs. By comparison, wealthy people or those physically beautiful individuals are less likely to show the same perseverance in a similar situation, as they think they can grab other opportunities. This can lower the chance of success. 


学生的范文(7+)主体两段

Some people argue that hard work and determination play a significant role in one’s success. I agree with this view although other people claim/suggest/believe that other factors, including appearance and money, are important.

 

 

A hard work and determination  B  提升自己c success in life

解释(1):很勤奋,不断学习,提升能力,可以处理一些别人做不了的事情

解释(2):有决心,遇到困难不会放弃,发现一些方法、技巧

举例:科学家,不断阅读书籍,增加理解, 做实验的时候,失败,继续尝试,有发现

 

Some people think that hard work and determination are essential to one’s career success since they are able to reach their full potential. Hardworking people choose to acquire knowledge constantly and upgrade their skills, so they can deal with some problems which are difficult to others. In addition, they have the determination to succeed, meaning that they will not give up when they face challenges. As a result, they will be likely to discover some innovative methods and techniques. For example, a dedicated scientist spends many hours reading books to deepen his or her understanding of a subject, and continues experiments even though they fail to get good outcomes. This is why he or she can finally make some ground-breaking discoveries.

 

 

A money and appearance   B 有资源                    c success in life

解释(1):有钱,获得更多的学习机会,有好的机会,可以投资

重要性:世界发展很快,有些机会需要比较大的投资

解释(2):社交场合,工作场合,留下好的印象, 获得更多信息

举例:明星,娱乐行业

 

Other people argue that money and appearance hold the key to one’s success as they have access to resources. If they are rich, they can possibly gain more learning opportunities to get familiar with the latest changes in the world, and make investments if they spot some business opportunities. Money is important if people want to seize some rare opportunities in the fast-changing world. Meanwhile, physically attractive people can make a favourable impression on others in social or work settings. The benefit is that they can expand social networks and gain information about new opportunities to advance their careers. This is particularly valuable to the success of people working in the entertainment industry.

 

In my opinion, I believe that determination and hard work play a more important role than other factors in one’s success. These qualities are important to one’s professional development, while money and appearance can help people gain support from others and this kind of support may not be always reliable.


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